Behavior Problems Resulting from a Traumatic Brain Injury

Welcome to the TBI-HELP Live Chat

Today's topic is: "Behavior Problems Resulting from a Traumatic Brain Injury."

Our Guest is: Ms. Lorraine Carrion, Primary Caregiver

[19:03:43] mod: Welcome! Tonight it is our pleasure to have with us Ms. Lorraine Carrion, Primary Caregiver. Welcome Lorraine..
[19:04:58] Lorraine: Thank you for inviting me. It is nice to know that I can share my experiences with others who are going through the same experience.
[19:05:58] Lorraine: I became a primary caregiver when my mother was in an accident 4 years ago when she was struck down by a motor cycle going to church. I am an only child and was advised to place her in nursing home and I refused. I took her home and she is living with my ever since the accident.
[19:08:43] mod: How does your mother's behavior affect the people you live iwth?..
[19:10:20] Lorraine: Her behavior has affected my social life. I used to be able to go out more or have people over but since she is living with me this has been cut down a lot.. We try to include her in our conversations but she take control over the conversation and be the center of attraction..
[19:11:50] mod: Welcome Joe: How did you prepare your home to be able to accommodate the needs of your mother?..
[19:12:37] Lorraine: Joe: I had to make living arrangements for my older daughter to live in the basement so that my mother could have a room near me. I had to build another bathroom on the first floor of the house so that it would be easier for her. I also needed to have my floors bare, no rugs so that she could be safe while walking. It was a considerable adjustment for all of us..
[19:14:28] mod: Joe: How supportive was your family to your decision to take your mother home?..
[19:15:23] Lorraine: Joe: I had all the support of my family, we are very close and they would not have it any other way but for her to live with us..
[19:16:52] mod: Jill: You spoke about your social life being limited...how do cope with that?..
[19:18:18] Lorraine: Jill: it was quite an adjustment for me. Giving up my job and my social life was very difficult. I also lost my husband 2 years prior to this. I felt that I needed a good support system and an outlet which became very limited..
[19:18:53] mod: Jill: Do you ever get angry because you have taken on this responsibility?..
[19:20:05] Lorraine: Jill: Yes, I do become angry which is normal. I also feel sorry for myself and my family but I would never change it.. My mother has lost the ability to show affection and appreciation and that is what I miss the most..
[19:21:26] mod: Susan: If your family were not in agreement would you have decided otherwise?..
[19:22:21] Lorraine: Susan: No, my decision still would have been the same. I could not have placed my mother in a home. There is only one mother!..
[19:22:52] mod: Jill: Does your family help with the care of your mother so that the burden is just not on you?..
[19:23:20] Lorraine: Jill: I am blessed with two great daughters that help in the care of their grandmother. They help bath, feed, take care of her personal hygiene. They also correct her when they feel that she is not nice to me. .
[19:24:54] mod: Jill: What type of services did you have come into your home to help with your mother?..
[19:25:44] Lorraine: Jill: I had physical therapy, occupational therapy and a home aid for three months.
[19:26:30] mod: Rail: Is your mother depressed or is she in denial of her TBI and her limitations?..
[19:27:35] Lorraine: Rail: I can say that my mother is in denial and only states that she has a fractured knee. Her memory has been compromised.. She does get depressed and we work hard to get her out of her depression.. We try to make her laugh so that she comes out of it. She has many mood swings.. Yes we have tried family trips and we never know the outcome. We have a lot of equipment that has to come with us such as wheelchair, change of clothing but she does enjoy the change..
[19:31:43] mod: Yasmin: How do you keep in good humor and not get depressed?..
[19:32:36] Lorraine: Yasmin: I take one day at a time and take in in stride. I also have a 4 month old grandchild that keeps me smiling.. The baby has also helped my mother's moods and behavior because I include her with the help of the baby. She is my assistant..
[19:34:23] mod: Rob: Does she remember you growing up as a child?..
[19:34:56] Lorraine: Rob: She really doesn't talk about ne growing up as much as she does her own youth..
[19:35:55] mod: Susan: I usually don't like meds, but there are some great ones, that in even low doses can alter moods and not adversely affect performance..
[19:36:40] Lorraine: Susan: I don't have her on any medications. She does not really need them. She doesn't even complain of a headache..
[19:37:31] mod: Susan: If you think you need more help, get a Drs. rx and petition the covering Co. whether Medicaid, Medicare or private ins. for a fair hearing.
[19:38:45] Lorraine: Susan: I understand but that is an area I can not go near. She is not the type of a person either that will go out to a senior citizen club so that I have time for me. She has a friend that I can rely on once in awhile.
[19:40:59] mod: Yasmin: Does she have Medicaid because that will really help if you need an aid as time goes on?..
[19:41:31] Lorraine: Yasim: No she does not have Medicaid only Medicare and AARP..
[19:41:51] mod: Yasmin: Does your mother become difficult to manage emotionally?..
[19:42:36] Lorraine: Yasmin: There are sometimes when she becomes difficult emotionally. When she doesn't get her way. She can get physical and has tantrums like a child..
[19:44:16] mod: How does your mother's behavior affect the other people in your home?..
[19:45:40] Lorraine: My mother's behavior affects others in the house because they also have emotions to deal with. They get angry, can't entertain the way they want to and stay on a different level of the house.. It is not easy for them.
[19:47:47] mod: Susan: Good behavior modification advice may be able to alleviate some of the unwanted behavior but it take a full effort by all involved and its not done overnight.
[19:48:42] Lorraine: Susan: It is good advise, however dealing with a 69 year old person is not easy. They do not understand behavior modification and do not like being treated like a child..
[19:49:45] mod: Lamont: How does your family and you keep it together with this type of constant pressure?..
[19:50:41] Lorraine: Lamont: Good question, we laugh, dance, sing and act silly. This holds both the family and her together.. A good sense of humor helps!..
[19:51:46] mod: Susan: There are methods that do not make someone feel like a child. they are also used for adults and can be quite useful and hopefully successful.
[19:52:56] Lorraine: Susan: I am sure that there are many methods that can work, however she is very set in here ways and won't change for anyone or anything..
[19:54:17] mod: Mod: Does your mother's attitude change from one minute to the other? How do you handle it.
[19:55:16] Lorraine: Mod: Her attitude change change in a split second. I try to reason with her and it can be successful. All the outside noises have to be eliminated and she has to focus on us solely. Her attitude can be baby like and then very aggressive. She can be so sweet one minute and then turn the next. Very sensitive.
[19:58:13] mod: Susan: It's not always expecting her to change, but to altr the way you react to her.
[19:58:52] Lorraine: Susan, you are correct. We do change the way we handle or react to her depending on the situation at the moment..
[20:00:24] mod: Susan: Good luck to you and stay strong.
[20:00:41] Lorraine: Susan: Thank you and you do the same.
[20:02:26] mod: Well it seems that our time is up for this week. I want to thank Lorraine for a very good session an invite her back in the future. Thank you all for participating in tonights session and I look forward to seeing you next week. Have ao good week and be safe! Good night
[20:04:10] Lorraine: Thank you for having me and I really enjoyed this session. It is nice to know that I am not alone in this situation and also that I can help others. It would be my pleasure to come back in the future. Good night to all..